Imperial Candidate Donald Trump

December 11, 2015

“Trump: I will mandate death penalty for killing police officers”

Republican presidential front-runner Donald Trump on Thursday vowed to issue an executive order to mandate the death penalty for anyone who kills a police officer.

I’m not even sure I disagree at all with the policy as policy, but…

Proposed future headlines:

“Trump: I will mandate judges make good decisions”
Trump vowed to make a “strong statement” with an executive order if elected.

“Trump: I will mandate Congress get its act together and pass the laws I want”

“Trump: I will mandate everyone can eat as much ice cream as you want and not gain weight”
Trump vowed to make a “strong statement” with an executive order if elected.

“Trump: I will mandate a minimum of 75 branches of government”
Trump vowed to get rid of “lame, weak” governments with “only three branches”, which he stated “are for losers”.

“Trump: I will mandate that any policy I like is henceforth constitutional”
Trump “not sure what the big deal is about this ‘Constitution’ I keep hearing about”, “not sure how that works”.

4 Responses to “Imperial Candidate Donald Trump”

  1. madblog Says:

    Trump’s declarations on what he’d do if he were President are exactly like when they go to a kindergarten class and ask the kids what they’d do if they were President.

  2. Will S. Says:

    “I will mandate the trains run on time!” ;)

  3. Right! “I promise if I am elected everyone will get ice cream!”

  4. Constitutionally the President cannot mandate sentences of criminal convictions. But he can urge and encourage such.

    The prior president could not mandate leniency in specific cases, either. He did so by intimidation and outright illegal actions.

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